On Seminary, III
Working vs. abiding
This past weekend, we hosted the annual Dayton Spirit & Truth Conference here at Stillwater, where I work and serve in ministry. Along with that, I have been immersed in all things having to do with baptism, specifically that of infant baptism, because I am writing an article on it in hopes of it being published. Prayers for that would be greatly appreciated!
You may be asking what these things have to do with seminary, which is a great question. The short answer is little to nothing. The long answer is that I was reminded of something God spoke to me while I was in seminary during the S&T Conference this weekend.
It was near the end of one of my semesters, I was exhausted, and probably had dozens of pages to write for the various classes I was in. As I was on my way to seminary for class, I cried out to God in my car out of my own frustration, asking Him, “Why am I so exhausted, and why is this so difficult if I am just doing all of this for You?” This is one of the times in my life when I was confident I heard the voice of God. Almost immediately after asking my question, God answered me like a loving parent would correct their toddler’s temper tantrum.
God said, “I didn’t ask you to do this for Me, I asked you to do this with Me.”
Lord, have mercy. I needed to hear that on that day desperately, and on every day since then. Maybe you need to hear it too. This weekend, I needed to be reminded of it once more. As I have stepped into full-time ministry, I have gotten caught up in my work in ways that were getting in the way of my time with God. The work I do is good, sure, because I get the privilege to work for God (in a sense). But God didn’t call me to just work for Him; He called me to abide in Him. Everything I do and everything I am ought to flow out of that.
Our culture presses upon its disciples that they are defined by what they do. Contrary to the disciples of the culture, the disciples of Christ are defined by the work of Christ done out of love for them. This is not to negate personal responsibility, of course. It is just a distinction between what you do defining who you are, and who you are in Christ defining what you do.
One of St. Augustine’s most famous quotes that often gets devalued of its potency is, “You have made us for Yourself, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.”[1] I read and remind myself of this quote often. It is easy to say, “amen” to it, yet it is far more difficult to live into it. True rest is found in God alone. Our work, spouses, children, hobbies, virtues, vices, and even sleep itself will never grant us the rest we long for at the core of our being. As created beings, we will only ever find the fullness of life, the truest form of rest, and eternal peace from our Creator.
I certainly needed to be reminded of this during the S&T Conference this weekend, and maybe you need to be reminded of it as well. Take some time to rest (another word for abide) in the words of Christ from one of my favorite passages in all of Scripture:
“I am the true vine, and my Father is the vinegrower. He removes every branch in me that bears no fruit. Every branch that bears fruit he prunes to make it bear more fruit. You have already been cleansed by the word that I have spoken to you. Abide in me as I abide in you. Just as the branch cannot bear fruit by itself unless it abides in the vine, neither can you unless you abide in me. I am the vine, you are the branches. Those who abide in me and I in them bear much fruit, because apart from me you can do nothing. Whoever does not abide in me is thrown away like a branch and withers; such branches are gathered, thrown into the fire, and burned. If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask for whatever you wish, and it will be done for you. My Father is glorified by this, that you bear much fruit and become my disciples. As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you; abide in my love. If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have kept my Father’s commandments and abide in his love. I have said these things to you so that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be complete.”[2]
[1] St. Augustine, Confessions, (Oxford, NY: Oxford University Press, 2008), 3.
[2] John 15:1-11 NRSV